AlltheJokes.com
The best humor! Ethnic jokes and funny stories.

Once upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for seven days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him. He inquired of God, "Where were you?". God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds; look my child, look what I've just finished making. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said what is it? God replied, "its another planet, but this time, I' ve decided to put LIFE on it. I've named it earth and there's going to be a balance between evertyhing on it.

For example, there's North America and South America. North America is going to be rich and South America is going to be poor, and the narrow bit joining them - that's going to be a hot spot. Now look over here. I've put a continent of white people in the North and another one of black people in the South".

And then the archangel said, "and what's that long white line there?" And God said "ahhh that's the land of the long white cloud - Aotearoa - (New Zealand) that's a very special place. That's going to be the most glorious spot on earth; Beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline. These people here are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be fond of travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieveing. And I'm going to give them this superhuman, undefeatable rugby team which will be blessed with the most talented, and charasmatic specimens on the planet, and they will be admired and feared by all who come across them". Michael the archangel gasped in wonder and admiration but then seeming startled proclaimed, "hold on a second, what about the BALANCE, you said ther was going to be a balance....."

God replied wisely, "wait until you see the neighbours I'm going to give them".

Do you know why the baby Jesus wasn't born in Iowa?
They couldn't find three wise men!!!

A tourist from the United States of America is at a resturant
in Havana. He tells the waiter that the USA is the best
country in the world because of the freedoms it has. He says,
"Take Freedom of Speech for example. I could stand in front
of the White House in Washington D.C. and yell 'President
Clinton is a bastard!' and nothing would be done to me." The
Cuban waiter replies, "We have that same freedom in Cuba. I
could stand in front of El Capital and yell the same thing and
nothing would be done to me too!"

How do you play Iraqi bingo? F18...B52...F18

Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?
A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.